easy! eeeasy!!!
See, this isn't about shaking table o.
Who's me?
Where the energy sef?
Me that just started finishing two noodle packs...
These are my hands o. 🙌
Before you crucify me, please hear me, or read me out...kikikiii.
The Igbo woman who said it, really finish me, no! Us (no be only me be 'Yorubas')
Indeed she left me shook!
and woke!
You'll soon understand why.
****
A few months ago, I supervised a project, in the East.
As part of our intervention, we organize trainings for cocoa farmers. And so, before daily commencement of activities, we do quality & compliance check.
This includes checking the quality of food, drink and water, provided by the contracted event planner, before they're served.
If they meet standard, they are served. Otherwise, they are rejected outrightly, or accepted based on a promise to comply going forward, and an open apology to participants.
When you work with Oyinbos, then, there's no compromising standards. They won't toy with their tax payers money. You either do your job right or don't do it at all.
And so, that rainy morning as I recall, madam Ngozi (not real name) led me to her office for the hallowed 'tasting'. She was the event planner.
"What's in here. and here and there?" I asked, opening and closing warmers, one after another, to certify their contents.
Satisfied, I made for the dinning table.
The aroma that taunted my nose, made my mouth water, reminding me I haven't eaten breakfast.
Salivating, I drew a chair, sat and said grace... (I canor coman shout)
I took my first bite. hmm...(amidst mouthfuls)...Good heavens! This is good. You made this? I turned to madam Ngo, Who nodded, smiling sheepishly
" Madam, Shey I told you I'll do a good job..." she said.
You did...And for the first time since arriving this town, Jellof actually taste like Jellof. What I've been eating is concoction battered with crayfish and colouring.
"Ha you mean am? My people cook good food o," she responded, smile vanishing.
Yes! I give to you people when it comes to your soups. I enjoy those a great deal. but not your Jellof rice.
You Igbos really seem to have a thing for crayfish. You made sure to feature it in every dam thing you cook, even Jellof.
Which makes it a no no for me.
Sha, you guys are still learning in that regard, where Yorubas stand.
You should come to Ibadan one of these days, let me treat you to a real party Jellof.
Though this good, but you still need a taste of the real deal.
Madam Ngo was silent.
I looked up, to request some serviettes, when I the words came.
"so if people are talking about food, Yorubas too will join mouth, you Yorubas cook naked soup" she frowned like she stared shit in the face
I managed...
You say?
"Madam, leave that thing o. When we Igbos cook, we put everything putable, okporoko, dry fish o, everything. Not like you who cook naked food? At least, there should be small small road blocks inside na. And how can soup just be flat, green inside plate, without eeenything, and you call that one soup? God forbid"
She shrugged it off like what I cannot say
egbami!!!
All these on top of who sabi cook Jellof pass?
Habaaa!!! This woman look in me in the eye and called my special efo elemi meje, my ewedu, gbegiri & abula with orisirisi inside, 'naked soup'?
And is it ewedu she referred to as 'green'!?
Leave that one joor, every tribe have their own cousine and how it is served. Here, I'm talking about the one general staple food common to all- Rice. Don't bring another thing inside joor.
"but na true I dey talk na, madam. See, I..."
I didn't allow her finish before I carried my sorry behind out, pretending It didn't hurt. clearly, she wasn't done.
Shey na me find trouble.
I mean, If she could yab the so hallowed 'amala with ewedu like that, what can she not yab. Did she even know it is served/eaten with orisirisi like bokoto, kpomo, shaki, eja kika, roundabout' and all those things she mentioned they add to their food? Just in a different way...
Abeg, No be me go dey explain that one. And so, up I stood my behind and...
"Madam Ngo...I think we're good. I'll call for you when it's time for lunch..."
Gbaaam!!!
The door closed behind me.
****
Are you still there?
Did the yab get to you too?
Perhaps this got you laughing
Abi you're thinking, thank God I'm not Yoruba, e nor consign me.
Really?
Just lemme teh you, no one can drag Jellof with us. Not even Ghana.
Clears throat...lols.
Now, jokes aside.
If you feel hurt, like I was hurt, just do what I did that fateful day, before you scroll to the next post.
One, pretend the yab didn't pain you, instead, do some deep introspective thinking, like I did.
That day, the word, 'naked soup' stuck forever.
It stirred up a wave of thought in me.
I couldn't help but ask myself...
*Am I not like the flat, unattractive, naked soup, madam Ngozi yabbed?
*Do I truly carry such substance and virtue worth reaching out for?
*On my own, am I an holistic package, (like edikanikong soup), or I'm like the naked ewedu that needs additional patching, here and there before it can stand?
*I mean, when I relate with people, or vice versa, are there orisirisi (virtue) they can grab or emulate, in me? or is flat! all they see?
*Does the sight of me, attract people or repel them?
*How deep and furnished am I? How much have I invested in me? Can it be liken to that of a nicely furnished edikanikong soup, or that of a flat, green, ewedu?
Don't stop there, add yours to the lot.
"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." Philippians 4:8
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P.S
Don't you just like the sight of this soup from Dooney's Kitchen?
That's how furnished we ought to be.
Blessings.
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